I’m in such a good mood today.
It’s so hard to even concentrate on work. Maybe because it’s Friday. Maybe because there’s a heatwave in Vancouver around the corner. Maybe because I had a week of revelations.Thanks to good friends and possibly lack of sleep.
The realization that two years ago this week, I was in such a bad emotional state. The words., “absolute wreck and depressing creature” come to mind to describe me. It was the first break with FilmGuy. I had moved out. I had no where to go. It was bizarre. This time last year, we were still trying to make it work. I can’t even remember what I got him for his birthday. I couldn’t think of anything I wanted to give him. I could think of many things I wanted to take away from him.
THAT is a sign the relationship is done. Gone. But I still hung on. I know…wtf.
NOW two years after I moved out, one year after I realized the end should have been solidified 7 months prior. I can only laugh, smile and drink the champagne.
Life is great. I have a job (knock on wood), I have the love of friends, I’m almost rid of all my debt and I have found a passion in sailing.
I can’t sweat the small stuff. The details I can’t control. How people perceive me, what they think of me, whether they like me or not. All I can do is smile and carry on. Not worry about it. It will all work itself out. Because if anything the last two years have taught me. It always does.