The world is pretty in pink…plus…sometimes it even sparkles

surfing in vancouver

well, couch surfing that is.

I haven’t found a decent place for a decent price in a decent area that I want to live. I have found places that I would settle for…but I’ll wait until I can’t settle.

So far, I’ll be bunking at my cousins next week then a night here and there among randoms, then subletting an apartment for three weeks and then i have no where.

If I do not find a place for August 1. Guess I’m moving back home to tsawwassen until I do find a place. Transient life is not for me. Woke up at 4:30am.

OH SO. I stopped by the ‘old apartment’ yesterday after work to speak with FilmGuy and settle up some bills etc. Low and behold he’s cleaned. Things have order and he’s gotten rid of all his clutter. All his little fucking figurines – from the Reservoir Dogs dolls things to a myriad NHL hockey figurines all still in their box. Apparently there is now room in the storage locker for them. AND he cleaned out his books and took his paper award to get framed.

AND THEN! he put his dirty dishes in the dishwasher instead of the sink. I started laughing. I couldn’t believe it. He reverted back to the guy i fell in love with in less then 10 days. The guy that I thought I could live with because he would clean up after himself and take care of himself and me.  It made me mad.

WHY COULDN”T HE BE THIS PRODUCTIVE WHILE I LIVED THERE?

He continues to say “well you weren’t that clean”, “you weren’t that tidy”, “Your desk was atrocious”.

My response – “I tried, but I gave up about 12 months ago because I was doing all the work. I cleaned under the bed. I cleaned the bathroom. In two years you cleaned the bathroom once and you wanted a reward”

Frustrating. The man I love is standing before me being the man I love. Unfortunately he disappeared while we were living together. Guess I wasn’t good enough for him.

I know I’ll be good enough for someone another day…but right now? I want to stick FilmGuy’s smug little shit eating grin in a garbage disposal.

No. I’m not bitter.

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